Jobs for our sweetheart!

When we asked Bug readers in our recent issue to offer suggestions for a new career path for axed Channel 9 Midday Show personality Kerri-Anne Kennerley, there was no way in the world we'd ever have guessed at the world-wide response to our request.
We were inundated with electronic mail - at least four times greater than the response to any other issue in the Bug's 10 years of publishing!

The e-mail from a D Burrows on November 28 was untypical of the responses.
"Not funny!" was all he had to say.

The very next day, a Mr Ned Kelly got into the spirit of the quest with these excellent ideas to keep Kerri-Anne gainfully employed.

1. Offsider for Troy Dan ( adventurer/Bullshit artist )
2. Partner for Kaj Busch on Rex Hunt Fishing Australia, (or whatever they call it next year ).
3. Stunt double for Michael Whitney on Who Dares Wins.
4. One way ticket holiday reporter for “Getaway”.
5. Singer for Telstra “On Hold” music
6. Lead role in the re-creation of the Titanic Disaster
7. New TV sales spokeswoman for Natural Glo
8. Host for Video Smash Hits.
9. Lead lady for the resurrection of “Chances”
10. TV sales spokeswoman for the “Millennium Bug Vaccine”

Regards
Ned

We had only just stopped celebrating this massive response when Tony Muckeridge dropped us an electronic missive on December 6: We might leave it un-cased to preserve the feel of his letter.

i am a contemporary of ms kennerly as i was at school in brisbane at the same time as kezza. i used to watch in wonder as she would appear on the channel nine show with “uncle” jim iliffe. her talents were obvious as she mimed the latest pop tunes and provided suitably exotic dance steps for imitation by her army of teen fans. put kerry back in the mime caper. get those ridiculous mtv 3 minute epics and give them the final cut. replace mtv with channel kerryanne and watch those other kerrys eat crap. news with kerry, weather with kerry cooking and home shopping, and at the end of the day (about 10 o clock when decent people are ready to bed down for the night,) a sentimental ballad mimed by kerryanne. in the morning its breakafast with kerryanne, followed by kerryannes kindy for the little ones so mum can enjoy her first tranquilizer of the day in peace. then instead of midday its four hours of variety, advice, chat, guests and most of all just the wholesome family value that is kerryanne as viewers tune to the four hour brunch to brisket program, “kerryanne all day!”
what do you think? is australia ready or, more to the point, worthy of channel kerryanne?

Our fourth and final letter came from a Nick Powell who obviously hails from OS. He provided this comment on December 21.

If she’s really as fantastic as you say, she could always come to the US
and get a job on the “Regis and Kathy-Lee” show!