Dear Doctor Dick,
How come women can eat a banana in public without getting the slightest bit embarrassed?

Wondering Wes of West Virginia
October 30.

Doctor Dick replies: Because unlike you, Wes, and any other man who might be watching, she actually thinks she's eating a banana.

Dear Doctor Dick,
What's one way of making my penis appear larger?

JD. Brisbane
November 4.

Doctor Dick replies: Start dating small women with even smaller mouths.

Dear Doctor Dick,
I have a very big problem. When me and my girl had sex for the first time we were 20 years old. It was very
painful for her. And from that time every time when we made love it is very painful for her. My penis never gets in to her fully because she has very big penis. And when I try to put my penis inside I must try so hard. When I put my finger inside her it is ok and she enjoyed it. I sometimes put two fingers inside and it is ok. Please tell me what is the problem and how can we solved it? Thank you.

JD
November 10.

Doctor Dick replies: I'm sorry to have to say this but your relationship sounds like it's been a total cock-up from the very beginning.

Dear Doctor Dick,
There's an awful amount of info on the net regarding penis enlargement – and all wanting money for the secrets. Some offer exercise routines to help improve size and intensity of orgasm. Are there exercises one can do to achieve this, or is this just a con? If exercise can help, where can I get information on the techniques?

Regards
Ron, October 30

Doctor Dick replies: Exercises are indeed very important in achieving penis enlargement and orgasm. The one I recommend is to grasp your penis as close as possible to its base and then slowly exercise the penis externally to its glans, back to its base, to the glans again, base, glans, base, glans, base, glans, oh yes, oh ah ah, ooohaaarrrr........

Dear Doctor Dick,
How long does it take to fill up your balls with cum after masturbating and getting it off?

Max,
October 15.

Doctor Dick replies: With a stored supply of semen and the right-sized syringe, a matter of moments. For any number of worthwhile health reasons alone, however, I would recommend you wait patiently for the natural process of refilling to achieve the same result. Depending on age, this could take several hours to six months.

Dear Doctor Dick,
My dick is five-and-a-half inches long and four-and-a-quarter round. Is it average size?

Jason October 15

Doctor Dick replies: It is incredibly average.

Got a sex problem that needs fixing? Doctor Dick can help.
Address your questions to Dr Dick, P.O. Box 696, Fortitude Valley. Q. 4006, or drop him an e-mail.