CAPRICORN
Your faith in reincarnation is shaken when, after spending a lifetime having people take absolutely no notice of you, you
return to earth as a car alarm.

CLINTON
You invent a new game for your staff – swallow the leader.

PAULA JONES
Oh, great. Now you open your mouth!

ARIES
Your name is Mary-Jane, you work as a bar attendant at a soutside Brisbane hotel and you are mightily offended when not one solitary star in the recent hard-copy version of The Bug is an Aries.

ALL OTHER ARIES
Friends suggest you may be hyper-sensitive when you claim to have been a victim of road rage after a lady bowler in a Toyota Corolla waves you past her as she attempts to reverse park.

RUBY
Don’t take your love to town.

LEO
You enjoy pushing your piles back in so much you decide to move to Sydney.

AQUARIUS
While typing at your home computer, a City Council work gang enters your yard and a small ferocious fox terrier jumps through your window and savages your mouse.

CANCER
Your obsession with hygiene and health moves into the realms of the absurd when you become the only person in town who owns a toilet brush brush.

BRENDAN ABBOTT
You stage a major bank robbery, not for the money but just to get the cops back on your scent because life's getting rather boring.

CAPRICORN
Your position in the world is a tropic of much speculation.

CANCER
You report a city council bus driver to his superiors for talking to himself while the bus is in motion.