Final not fixed, says Star Picket League

 

Senior Star Picket League officials have hit back at claims they “fixed” the end of season play-offs to ensure the competition’s grand final was held in Brisbane with the Brisbane Bolts as finalists.
Management of the Brisbane Bolts has attacked acting general manager of the rival JDG competition, Mervyn De Prave, who raised the allegations.
After last week’s JDG grand final in which the Albury Apricots trounced the much fancied Whyalla Wardrobes, De Prave joined JDG staff at a celebratory dinner at Sydney’s exclusive Rooters nightclub.
During the dinner, De Prave broke off his karaoke rendition of The Seekers’ 60s hit, Morningtown Ride, to launch a tirade against Star Picket League.
He accused Star Picket League organisers of fixing the late season games to eliminate strongly performing New South Wales teams such as the Tweed Jackets and the Orange Oranges.
"The last thing Star Picket League wanted in its first season was a final played in Sydney,” a weary and agitated De Prave said.
Referring to the bitter split in the game which has seen Star Picket League sign up former JDG clubs and poach JDG players, De Prave said: “Sydney is where the split in the game has been felt the most.
"They (Star Picket League) were shitting themselves that two New South Wales teams would get into the final round and they’d have to have their grand final in Sydney.
"Their attendance figure would have been shot to buggery and would have been a fraction of the crowd our own JDG grand final attracted,” he said before departing the stage via a front-row table.
A few minutes later – after being revived by associates – a still fatigued and highly strung De Prave returned to the stage to perform Itchycoo Park by The Small Faces, only to again stop for another blast at Star Picket League.
"I reckon the fix was in at about the third round,” he sang.
"They needed to hold the grand final in Brisbane and that meant guaranteeing the Brisbane Bolts a place in the final.”
Later at the St Vincent’s Hospital casualty section, De Prave would not elaborate on how the games may have been “fixed”.
But he challenged Star Picket organisers and the Brisbane Bolts to deny his claims.
Yesterday, Star Picket League spokesman, Adrian Source, said De Prave’s allegations were “to be expected”.
“Merv’s been a bit upset since the United Nations Security Council ruled against the JDG last year,” Source said.
”Let me assure all fans of the game that Star Picket League would never do anything to harm its interests."
Brisbane Bolts team manager, Kevin Guttering, also attacked De Prave’s claims.
"The Bolts have no desire to enter into a slanging match with Merv and the JDG,” Guttering said.
"That sort of approach does nobody any good.
"But these wild and largely untrue claims have more to do with Merv’s frustration at his rumoured sexual impotence and the fact his wife is seeking comfort in the arms of one of our star players, Billy ‘Drainpipe’ Draper.
"Everyone knows that – except perhaps Billy’s wife.”