
Problems rampant in nation's capital
A deluge of requests from Canberra to The Bug's resident
sex therapist Dr Dick has sparked fears of an epidemic of sexual
trauma in our nation's capital.
Here are just two of the pleas received recently by Dr Dick along
with his replies.
Dear Doctor Dick,
I am a healthy and active man in my mid-40s working in a job involving
high pressure, long hours and intense public scrutiny.
My problem is that my boss, now almost 64, refuses to retire and
give me a go at the top job.
He recently made it plain that he'll be continuing to work on
for an unspecified period.
The whole situation is affecting my outlook on life, and has had
a detrimental effect on my sexual performance. Can you help?
Peter - Canberra
Doctor Dick replies: Of course this type of situation affects
your libido, even the most liberal of minds cannot but help but
be influenced in their private lives by work situations.
You need to treasure the moments you and your partner have together,
so any intrusion by such negative thought can only be doing your
relationship harm.
Once such a thought enters your mind it can be impossible to budge
it.
The question I always ask in such circumstances is this: How 'ard
do you have to work before people recognise your talent?
Your boss seems to be a very selfish person and, without knowing
the details, I'd hazard a guess and say he suffers from "short
man" syndrome. Am I right? I bet I am.
My advice is to wait till after your next erection and see what
the results are.
Dear Doctor Dick,
I am a healthy and active man in my early-50s working in a job
involving high pressure, long hours and intense public scrutiny.
My problem is that several of my colleagues have made it clear
they think I'm not up to the task and that they want to get rid
of me.
They keep saying so to anyone who'll listen and even throw around
figures to show my main competitor is more popular than me, even
though other figures show our respective organisations are almost
neck and neck with our shared customer base.
The whole situation is affecting my outlook on life, and has had
a detrimental effect on my sexual performance. Can you help?
Simon - Canberra
Doctor Dick replies: I don't want to labour the points made
in the previous letter, but this situation can be easily - I repeat,
be easily - rectified.
You need to identify the leader of the opposition to you.
No doubt he'll be someone swanning around in the background, not
upfront enough to declare his true attitude towards you.
I can guarantee that when you confront him you'll be able to confirm
your suspicions from the ruddy complexion his embarrassment will
trigger.