'Nobody expected the other side would
throw in the towel-heads so fast'
Prime Minister John Howard chose the Alan Jones talkback
program on Sydney radio station 2GB to announced a significant
shift in Australia's stand on post-war Iraq.
Here is an edited transcript of the interview.
JONES: Thanks for joining me this morning, Prime Minister.
HOWARD: Thanks, Alan. It's a pleasure. I enjoy coming on
your program.
I am always energised whenever I come here and discuss issues
with those Australians who take the time to think issues through,
unlike the majority of left-leaning commentators and academics.
JONES: Yes, yes indeed. Too true. Now we have our first
caller. Hello Steve?
CALLER: Yes, thanks Alan. I want to ask Mr Howard if he
agrees with me that nobody expected the other side would throw
in the towel-heads so fast.
And what about all those Iraqis marching in Baghdad, flailing
their chests, mumbling jibberish and demanding a strict Islamic
state.
They want one just like the one next door in Iran which is part
of the axis of evil, isn't it?
What was the point in bombing them in the first place if that's
the way they respond?
HOWARD: Thanks, Steve. You've made a couple of good points
there.
You've obviously been thinking deeply about this.
First of all, I think you may be being a bit harsh.
We must give the Iraqis time to settle into the unfamiliar situation
of not having Saddam Hussein controlling everything they do...
JONES: If I may say, Prime Minister, we've had lots of
calls this morning and most of them back what Steve just said.
HOWARD: Really? By a big margin?
JONES: Very.
HOWARD: Steve, I think you're right. I mean, who'd have
thought that the Sh'its who make up 60 per cent of the Iraqi population
and who have been repressed by Saddam Hussein for two decades
would want a say in their nation's future?
The finest minds in the US intelligence community didn't see that
coming. No one did.
I didn't. Rufus Badinage didn't. Did you see that coming, Alan?
JONES: No, sir, I didn't. Couldn't have. It would have
been impossible to predict that.
HOWARD: Exactly, Alan. Mmmm that's nice. A little bit to
the left.
JONES: My pleasure, sir. Just undo that button please.
HOWARD: Okay, there you go.
JONES: Yes, that's better. Now on to our next caller. Hello,
Brian?
CALLER: Yes, thanks, Alan. I reckon the Iraqis should be
grateful we went over there and kicked the crap out of them.
Yet now they turn around and start to demand the US gets out and,
on top of that, the Iraqis want to run their country themselves.
They just can't be trusted, can they?
HOWARD: Thanks, Brian. You've obviously studied a bit about
this. Thanks for your very insightful question.
I think you're right. It's all gone pearshaped really quickly.
God, Alan, you're getting good at that.
JONES: Something I picked up in London.
HOWARD: That's fantastic. Anyway, look, we said we'd liberate
the Iraqis and we've done that.
Now for them to turn around and demand the system of government
they want is to my mind appalling and totally un-Iraqi.
JONES: Is that nice?
HOWARD: Yes, yes. Don't stop.
JONES: Thanks, sir.
HOWARD: And now the Sh'its want us to leave immediately.
The finest minds in the US intelligence community didn't see that
coming? No one did. I didn't. Rufus Badinage didn't. Did you see
that coming, Alan?
JONES: No, sir, I didn't. Couldn't have. It would have
been impossible to predict that. Turn over now, please.
HOWARD: Oooooooh.
JONES: We'll come back to the Prime Minister shortly. I'm
being told we have Simon Crean on the line wanting to respond
to what Mr Howard has just said.
For those of you who don't know, Simon Crean is an insignificant,
whining little former trade union heavy who's currently way out
of his depth in the job of leading the rag-tag bunch of misfits
known as the Labor Party.
Good morning, Mr Crean.
CREAN: Good morning, Alan. It's a pleasure to be with you.
JONES: So what do you have to say for yourself. As if it
matters anyway.
HOWARD: Good one, Alan.
JONES: Thanks. Just lie back.
CREAN: I just want to point out that I will be responding
to the Prime Minister's comments as soon as my adviser and master
strategist, Wayne Swan, has conducted a poll to see what people
would prefer me to say.
JONES: Typical wishy-washy position to take. It's no wonder
you're lower than ....
HOWARD: My trousers...
JONES: What?
HOWARD: Where are my trousers?
JONES: Over the back of the chair.
HOWARD: Thanks.
CREAN: You know, it was only just the other day that Swannie
reminded me once again just how many seats Labour would have lost
last time around if we hadn't adopted his brilliant strategy of
agreeing with everything the PM said and did on border protection,
turning back leaky boats, shoving our problems off to those desperates
to our near north, that sort of thing.....
JONES: God, are you still on the line?
CREAN: ...to be blunt, the guy's a bloody political genius.
At least that's what he says his latest straw poll tells us.
JONES: Oh look, Mr Crean, why don't you just go away, you
pathetic loser.
CREAN: Thanks Alan, it's been a pleasure.